Divorce - The Reasons People Get Divorced

Why Do People Get Divorced?

People get divorce for so many different reasons.  It is hard to peg down just one common reason.  The concept of Irreconcilable Differences was introduced to address this issue.  It used to be that you had to have a reason why you wanted to divorce and then you had to prove that reason in court.  Divorce became so common and the courts finally caught up with the times.  You now can get divorced without having to prove anything.

Just because you don't have to prove anything doesn't mean that there aren't reasons why people get divorced.  Today I will address the top three reasons; Money, Adultery and Incompatibility.

Money

Money is a big issue.  The reasons behind why money is an issue are endless but in general they come down to people disagree about how to spend money, how much money to save, one party is working too much, the other party isn't working or contributing, someone is spending all the money on things the other party doesn't agree with.

Adultery

While technically adultery can be a "for cause" grounds for divorce, it  is often the reason people seek a divorce on the grounds of irreconcilable differences.  What I mean by that is that if you say you are seeking a divorce on the grounds of adultery, then you would have to prove the adultery.  If you aren't attached to having the other party being labeled an "adulterer", you can seek a divorce on the grounds of irreconcilable differences and you don't have to prove anything.  Some people live in a constant state of adultery and it doesn't seem to bother them.  Other people are truly offended by the misdeed and see it as a betrayal.

Incompatibility

While you would think that incompatibility shows up early in a marriage, it can actually show up at anytime.  In newly weds, incompatibility makes the parties do a gut check when they realize that they their personalities don't match, they don't love each other or it was just a fling.  In older couples, incompatibility usually shows up in "we have grown apart".  It isn't maybe that they were originally incompatible, they just don't have any compatibility now.

If you are seeking a divorce and need to speak to one of our attorneys, give us a call, (208) 472-2383.  Our divorce attorneys have the experience to help you.

Uncontested Divorce

What is an Uncontested Divorce?

People often ask me what an uncontested divorce is.  There are many types of divorce (check my website for the various kinds www.lawboiseid.com.html) including uncontested, contested, default etc.  An uncontested divorce simply means the parties agree, or substantially agree, about the terms of the divorce.  They have essentially worked out the details themselves or they have the majority of the details worked out but need some help from a divorce attorney or a mediator to settle on the other details.

What Next?

So, what do you do if you have the details of your divorce worked out or substantially worked out?  One party, or one party's attorney, needs to file the divorce petition, just like you would in any other divorce.  The other party needs to be served with the divorce papers just like the way you would in any other divorce.  Likewise, if children are involved, the parties need to attend the focus on children workshop. 

So What's the Difference?

The difference comes in how the paperwork is handled after the initial steps are taken. Once all the wrinkles are worked out, your divorce attorney will either prepare a stipulation or prepare the default paperwork.  A stipulation is an agreement between the parties as to the terms of the divorce which is submitted along with the final paperwork.  That agreement contains all the terms of the divorce.
A default judgment occurs if the parties decide that they don't want to stipulate to anything but that one party just won't fight the divorce.

It is important, in a stipulation, to be as specific as possible so that all the details are covered and there is nothing that is left out which would necessitate the case being reopened.  Likewise, if the divorce is taken by default, if the paperwork isn't specific enough, there could be an argument that the case needs to be reopened. Just an FYI, there are other reasons too why a default judgment may be reopened.  I will touch on that in a later post.

In an uncontested divorce, once the judgment and decree of divorce, the stipulation are signed by the judge and all the relevant divorce paperwork is filed, the divorce is final. 

How long does it take?

A truly uncontested divorce can happen very quickly.  Once all the paperwork is submitted and no amendments or further changes are made, a judge will sometimes sign the decree within 2 weeks.  Sometimes, if there are children involved, the judge may wait the 21 day period allowed for a party to file an Answer before they will sign the stipulation.  The long and short of it is that uncontested divorces can, and do, happen very fast. 

If you need to speak with an attorney concerning divorce, child custody, child support, modification or any other family law issue, give us a call, (208) 472-2383.  You will be glad you did.